All you need is love

its been a while

Tue, 11 Oct 2005 19:14:26 GMT

i hate ADD. I'm a secretary for my friend's dad. And I've been busting through work like crazy today. But then all of a sudden....ADD strikes. I havent taken a break all day, so thats-a what im-a gonn-a do. i have to work downtown tomarrow. which really isnt that bad of a thing, i mean make pretty decent money. its just that since im serving alcohol and i have boobs, men think that im basically stripper-like. im not trying to say anything bad about strippers at all. I just hate the fact that men think that they can get away with anything simply because im working for tips. thats really shitty. anyways. im really tired of crap... it seems like everyone around me has a pretty decent relationship. and even if its not the best relationship in the world, it still makes it easier to come home from a bad day and have someone there to help you with it. friends are good for that too, but in the long run...having someone that loves you and needs you is just so important. ive been depressing myself lately by reading the note book, bridges of maddison county, message in a bottle. not very good books to read when you're a single girl.. anyways back to work. i love eveyone.

herro..

Thu, 19 Aug 2004 03:36:21 GMT

i havent updated in like...well, almost a year. wow. But i can't sleep. so i figure this would be perfect timing. Yeah. sleep..i need it. its getting to the point where even if im trying to sleep next to paul, im wide awake. Anyways. Im going to american idol try-outs next week in orlando. i have no singing talent what so ever, but one of my best friends is the most talented singer out there, so im going for moral support. I havent talked to nick in a long ass time, im miss him. I wish i could have seen him before he moved, but alas...life isnt perfect. nick, if you read this..sorry bout your toe..ech..yep. im looking for a house to buy. its driving me crazy living with my mom and my sister. Her son its just constintly screaming and when hes not, that means hes sleeping and in that case, if i sneeze then "i'll wake the baby" i miss paul. hes got his whole band thing right now. and im cool with that, its just that i never get to see him. I feel like we have a long distance relationship now. jesus...now im just going to make myself depressed. anywho-im going to lay down and shut my eyes, if that dosent work..im waking up trista and making her give me cupcakes. goodnight all.

im saaaaaaaaailing awaaaaaay...

Tue, 06 Jan 2004 17:59:20 GMT

buenos. i havent updated in a while. I was watching sex in the city wit my sister last night and just having one of those girl-talks. She mentioned something thats been on my mind alot. She described the type of person she can see me with. and shes right. sometimes i get so confused in my life. I dont know like sometimes i want a guy like paul. hes strong and funny and just well...kinda like a rebel. i mean hes got the whole rock star thing going for him but other times i think to my self..what if...what if hes not the one for me. i hate being unsure of things al the time. im never sure if what i want is good for me or not. i miss hanging out with my friends. it seems like if im not at work im at home getting ready for work or getting ready to go to sleep. i just dont know any more. i've got alot of thinking to do. hmm...i love everyone.

Too much boom boom

Thu, 04 Dec 2003 07:51:20 GMT

yeah so i have a UTI (urinary tract infection) and it hurts so bad. And i asked the doctor why my back was hurting and he said it was because of my kidneys. So thats nice to know. He also said it was caused by too much sex. That was a little embaressing. Not only am i telling him how my pee hurts hes telling me i need to lay off the boom boom. Oh my, it sucks though. And Stacie had to come and hold my hand while i peed. Thank you Stace-Face, *kisses*
Well i have to open in the morning, and i still have to do the flash report! WEEE!!! i love Barnies Coffee and Tea. HA! I love everyone.

i guess i shouldnt complain...its not like i live in a fish tank

Mon, 01 Dec 2003 05:57:48 GMT

Grrr...i hate making assumptions. Paul was supposed to be home tongiht from the wedding in Miami, and he hasnt called me since the day he left. most likely he got home late and went to bed. in my mind i like to make these really fucking horrible scenarios. like i think that he cheated on me with his exgirl friend while he was up there and either hes not comming back or hes going to dump me when i see him. yay. i love my mind. and its funny. if i do see him tomarrow, i wont mention the fact that i was so scared of this. im so afraid of letting them know how much i care about them. everyday i worry about my freinds. im so scared that one of them is going to get hurt. and im so afraid of telling even my best friend how much i love her, and how i hope everything in her life is well. why is that? why am i so afraid of telling people that i care about them? like in letters...i can say anything. i can tell people exactly how i feel. but speaking it to them is another story. eh, oh well...just a little mystery in my life that i might never figure out. i love everyone. <~~SEE>????

do wa diddy

Fri, 21 Nov 2003 04:37:59 GMT

Well..i don't know what to make of this world anymore. Sometimes i laugh uncontrollebly, other times i feel obligated to laugh. like yesterday i had this old lady come into the store and she was ordering a drink and i looked up and saw meaghan and i stuck my tongue out at her and then the old lady stops right in her tracks and stics her tongue out at me!! hahhahaha! it was great and then this other lady ordered a tea, so i made it for her and shes like " do you have any other tea, i hate anything green." and at that moment i realized how stupid people can be...i mean, come on!! dosent she eat her vegetables??? i dont know. i dont think i was ment to be happy in relationships. i love everyone!!

hey katie has a little smile on her face, lets make her frown!!!

Sun, 16 Nov 2003 05:57:26 GMT

Some times rhe world just pisses me off. I dont understand anyone anymore. Like, me for example. I try so hard to be a happy person and usually im just as happy as i seem, but for some reason or another, it angers people. Tonight at work i was in a really good mood, and im always sort of a goofball, so im making up the pastery case and im talking non-sence. And dan was making fun of me for being happy. And then Paul started laughing right along with him. I really wish i had a guy who would stand up for me. Its like that song says "when a man loves a woman, he turn his back on his best friend if he put her down" all im asking for is when people make fun of me, DONT FUCKING SIT THERE AND LAUGH!!! everytime someone told me he wasnt worth the time and then hes just a scum-bag, i stood up for him, and now my boss likes him and people who wouldnt even think twice about him love him to death. i just hate the fact that if im in a good mood theres always someone there with a rude fucking commment. And god forbid i be sad or something, then oh..katies depressed...shes boring. MAybe im just here as a sort of punching bag. There are probably 10 people in this world that i really trust. the rest of them are the people im nice to, and try to find bull shit to talk to them about. GOD! if no one wants me to be in a good mood, and no one wants me to be ad, WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT FROM ME!?!?!?! i swear, i try to hard to be everything to everyone. Well, thats gonna stop. If im in a god-damn good mood, im gonna be silly and smile, this world needs more smiles. i just really wish sometimes that things would go smoothly for me, but no. i have a hard time with everything. right now my boyfriends probably fucking some 14 year old little girl (god knows he has them crawling all over him) i want love. I want to feel that deep passion from someone like that guy in the song mentioned above did. when a man loves a woman, i want to marry the guy that wrote that damn song. no, i jsut want a protector. Someone who will wake up in the middle of the night and get out of bed if i hear a strange sound. someone who hold me really close durring the scary part of the movie. soemone who would remeber the names of my cats. i just want love. ii dont know if paul feels the same way. i really wish i could tell him all these things...but me? katie? tell someone how i really feel? not possible. sigh. i love everyone

Thu, 16 Oct 2003 14:42:53 GMT

"Omaha"

Which Counting Crows 'August and Everything After' song are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

give me a P give me a M give me a S what does that spell???

Thu, 16 Oct 2003 09:08:31 GMT

Yeah, i got a lot on my mind. heartburn...frenchbread pizza. Sucksss
I went to Paul's after work tonight. Im so fucking scared. Im so afraid hes going to hurt me. I feel so stupid for letting myself like someone again. Hes a really great guy, but im just so nervous. He tells me all the time that he wont hurt me, but god knows ive heard that one before. Me and my mom got into a fight today. She doesnt like Paul, and then she goes on telling me all this shit like, im going to listen. My mom's always been one of my best friends. I just wish shed let me make my own choices. If i get hurrt again, i get hrt again and for some reason or another it was ment to happen.
Fuck my tonsils. My right toncil is so swollen and has white dots on it, its so gross. I had rich look at it earlier and he said i should go to a doctor. I think im going to do just that. Good ol doctors. I hope he just takes them out. perfect timing to get toncilitus. 4 days till my b-day. If i get my toncils taken out on my b-day ide hope the nurses and doctors would come into my room and celebrate it with me. Aww~! that would be so fun! only, i couldnt say thank you to them, because my throat would hurt too bad. Oh well, it would be cool if they were like "hey katie, on behalf of you being a great patient we decided to let you keep your toncils" eww! they would be in a jar of formaldihide!
SIGH! Well, one of my most bestest friends is going to michigan for a week, which is very sad. Its gonna suck not having her here. I get to play with her ferrits while shes gone though! I have to be at school in 4 nd a half hours! I need more sleep. Goodnight loves! I love everyone!

reach down your hand in your pocket, pull out some hope for me

Tue, 14 Oct 2003 07:21:50 GMT

YAWN!!!!!!!
Im so sleepy but i can't sleep! This sucks so bad. I Don't know how the hell to sleep. Ginger printed out some stuff on line about not sleeping, so when i get to work tomarrow, im gonna look at it. Today was ok, i havent really updated in a while. Things are goo though. All except for the not sleeping thing. The only time i feel really comfortable is when im with Paul. Its really weird. Im so happy with him. At first i was so nervous. Starting yet another relationship, which i was sure i was just going to run away from. But, this time i just can't. *deep in thought* sigh.
Oh well. Anyways, MY BIRTHDAY IS IN 6 MORE DAYS!!! OCTOBER 20!!!!
HHHHOOOORRRRRAAAAAYYYYY!!!! Anyways..Im going to go bathe...with bubbles...and toothpaste...ooohh yeah. I love everyone.

yay! it worked

Thu, 09 Oct 2003 04:03:42 GMT

you just witnessed my first time of using that quiz thang. anyways,
today was a realllllyyy good day. yes, i would have to say that it was wonderful. i got to see paul and his friends, i got to see lindsay, i got to play with my nephew, i got to talk to sean, jenny lee (as if that alone isn't the best part of my day)...i even finished my DANG term paper. i know that last part was a bit violent, but still...holy crap!!! i had to write this 4 page report on things that well...just don't spark my interest. I had the day off today. *a hush runs over the crowed* yes thats right. Ms. Taylor did not work today...but tomarrow is another rousing day at the old mines. if anyone reads this and they have something nice to say about "whooping cough" please post a thingie. i love everyone!!!!!

i hope this works....

Thu, 09 Oct 2003 03:52:43 GMT

You should be dating a Gemini
21 May - 20 June
This mate is inquisitive, entertaining and
charming, liberal, broad-minded and youthful.
Though Gemini has a tendency to be impatient,
gossipy and sometimes irritable, this twin has
the ability to expresses his or her pent up
emotions during sex!

What Zodiac Sign Are You Attracted To?
brought to you by Quizilla

im so scared of bears

Tue, 07 Oct 2003 04:49:28 GMT

today was nice. work was not nice after 5 cause i was stuck with all new people. but i got to work with dan and paul for a couple of hours and that was fun. i love everyone

thanks to big black man

Mon, 06 Oct 2003 03:17:54 GMT

today was way cool. i got to work with really great people. hahaha...this guy that works over at the comfort zone comes barging into the back room while me and susan were counting her till, and he scared susan and i think susan scared him cause he accidently dumped his entire cooler full of water on the floor which caused a huge flood!!! but it was ok, he helped us mop. i feel bad for him, he looked so embarresed. and then me, stacie and jami went outside for a ciggerette break and i said, "well, at least half the moppings done!" and stacie goes, "yeah, thanks to big black man" HAHAHAHAHA oh my goodness, it was hilarious!!! my back hurts kinda. anyways, so no one trained paul for the cart, so i was there untill like, 8:00. but it was ok, paul and me hung out for a while. hes such a wonderful person, but he dosent think so. I do. I think im just gonna kidnap him and take care of him, because he dosent. yep, thats my plan. so anyways, i went to eat w/ lindsay tonight. that was neet. *sniff sniff* i should go to sleep. I love everyone

im so sick, its makes me sick

Sun, 05 Oct 2003 06:01:21 GMT

When the day is long and the night, the night is yours alone,
when you're sure you've had enough of this life, well hang on.
Don't let yourself go, everybody cries and everybody hurts sometimes.

Sometimes everything is wrong. Now it's time to sing along.
When your day is night alone, (hold on, hold on)
if you feel like letting go, (hold on)
when you think you've had too much of this life, well hang on.

Everybody hurts. Take comfort in your friends.
Everybody hurts. Don't throw your hand. Oh, no. Don't throw your hand.
If you feel like you're alone, no, no, no, you are not alone

If you're on your own in this life, the days and nights are long,
when you think you've had too much of this life to hang on.

Well, everybody hurts sometimes,
everybody cries. And everybody hurts sometimes.
And everybody hurts sometimes. So, hold on, hold on.
Hold on, hold on. Hold on, hold on. Hold on, hold on. (repeat & fade)
(Everybody hurts. You are not alone.)

do you have a tissue?

Sat, 04 Oct 2003 15:34:20 GMT

Im so bloody sick. Holy crap...i woke up this morning and felt my head. My neck can hardly support it. my eyes are heavier too. ungh, and iwork today too. but it shall be a good day. i got jenny lee and dan with me, so it won tbe that bad, i love everyone.

i could use some cold med. and a time machine so i can go see elvis in concert :( now im just depressed

my job sucks

Thu, 02 Oct 2003 05:13:15 GMT

Well, after much sorting and shuffeling and looking and booking (and shamboozles and floozes gill-whats-itz and woozles) i finally was able to leave my day of work. i had to do the flash report tongiht and everything was so unorginized, and i was out helping my emlpoyees all night (because im stupid) and so i didn't get started on my work untill like 9:15, so i was there untill about 11:30. GRrr..oh well, everything happens for a reason.
Anyways, I got my glasses yesterday. HOLY COW!! i see everything now! its soo good!! weeee!!! look at me go...
well, i think im doomed to be single for the rest of my life. Im a weirdo. I don't think i have anything to offer the opposite sex. OK, im a big goofball. I think i've embaressed everyone ive ever dated. i can't help it though! some times i just got to start singing an oldies song at the top of my lungs at a very inappropriate moment. Also, i'm a big commitment freak. i get so scared when i think about long term commitments. i didn't used to be like that, but mike kind of fucked me up in that department. Dang...oh well. perhaps im going to end up a little old lady on an island with no one but her cats. i complain too much.
I love everyone.

my life is fun...like a shot in the eye with a pop tart

Tue, 30 Sep 2003 05:02:08 GMT

FUCK MY CAR, FUCK JEREMIAH, FUCK MY ASS CRAMP, FUCK MY VISION, FUCK MY INDECISIVENESS, FUCK BAD DAYS, FUCK SKINNY GIRLS THAT WEAR TOO MUCH MAKE-UP,
FUCK HITLER, FUCK RACISM, FUCK THAT GUY THAT CUT ME OFF THE OTHER DAY, FUCK ANYONE WHO IS RUDE TO THE GIRLS I WORK WITH, FUCK ANY ONE WHO IS MEAN TO MY FRIENDS, FUCK DR.WARREN, FUCK CANCER, FUCK MATERIALISTIC BASTARDS, FUCK THAT LADY WHO SUED MCDONALDS FOR MAKING HER FAT, FUCK PEOPLE WHO HUNT FOR FUN, FUCK THAT GUY WHO MADE FUN OF MY SISTER IN HIGHSCOOL, FUCK THAT WIERD GUY THAT KEEPS CALLING ME, FUCK MY BOOBS THAT GROW TOO FAST,FUCK PROCRASTINATION, ARGHGHHHHH!!!!!!!!

I LOVE EVERYONE!

You want to be where you can see your troubles are all the same

Sun, 28 Sep 2003 23:13:55 GMT

I love my friends so much!!!! they make me happy, no matter what. i watched me nephew today... weee! it was much fun. i love everyone!

Wow..i really need to wash out my brain now...

Sun, 28 Sep 2003 10:21:57 GMT

oh wow. I just had the weirdest fucking dream. I had this dream that it was halloween and me and my sister were so busy that we didn't get to go trick-or-treating, and i felt really bad, like to the point were i was almost crying. So, i turned on the news and it had the last house that was giving out candy on there, so i tried going there, but it was too late. So then it switched over to this halloween party. Me, Kristen and Jenny Lee were there and we we playing this karma game...So weird. We started out the game by kissing our partner, and suddenly nick was there, and i really wanted him to be my partner so i ran up and kissed him...(it was really good too.) wow...heh...anyways..moving right along...then it switched over to another halloween party over at jeremiahs house. And he kept trying to like..touch me...and i knew it was bad, so i told him i was going to sleep. Then i went into his room and took a nap. And then i was in this garden thing and there was this albino-looking guy. I felt so bad for him (not because he was albino) i just felt really bad. So i sat next to him and he started crying and he put his head on my shoulder and he explained to me that he just wished the world could be like nicer. Not just to him, but just nicer in general. Then i woke up and i was back in jerimiahs bed. i got out and i walked into the kitchen and i looked outside and it was dark, but everyone was calling my name. So i wnet outside and Niki jeremiah and someone else was there. Then jeremiah comes up to me and starts trying to touch me again. Then Nick suddenly appeared. So i ran up to him and he carried me into his car. And then i felt like more safe then ever. oh my gosh. ok, i had to write that down or else i knew ide forget. i love everyone.

5 months and counting...grrr...

Sat, 27 Sep 2003 07:37:50 GMT

Wee! Today was no fun at work. I don't even think it's worth mentioning. Ugh. OH! and my car sucks. Ok, i was driving down the road and all of a sudden i smelled smoke, i look behind me and my back seat is a cloud of smoke, so i pull over and i opened my trunk..dun dun dun dun...and IT was full of smoke! holy crap..i almost swallowed my tongue! So, I called Andy and he said it was probably my CD player. Anyways...I'm driving home after work and i realize that my interior lights don't work. I swear, if it's not one thing its another. Sigh. Nick hasent called me in a while. This girl from Auntie Anns keeps asking about me, and i dont know why. I want to go talk to her, however with the help of Jeremiah (psych!!) I never get a chance to. Hmm...i just dont know. I went out to dinner with Lindsay, Phil, and Sean tonight. Seans so nice, he paid for my dinner and won me this scare crow thingie...it was very sweet. Yeah, so...I love everyone, and nick, if you read this...go on...call katie.

aberfoyle is the best water in the freakin world!!!

fuck it...

Fri, 26 Sep 2003 05:06:58 GMT

I can't wait to get the hell out of here for a while. Last entry i had mentioned all the wonderful toe-painting i would do on my day off. Oh boy. Fucking Jeremiah calls me when I'm at publix with Lindsay and he's like, "Uhhh, I didn't get any sleep and you're the only other manager that can work, unghh...can you cover my shift?" So, being the push-over that I am, I said yes. I took into account the fact that he treats me like shit, so i told him I'd be there at 3 instead of 2. Wooo...Just call me little rebel rosey. So, I just really wanted to scream tonight. ha. maybe i should voice my oppinion more often. Maybe, i should move. Maybe i should become a lesbian. maybe i should try tofu. Maybe i should shut the hell up.
I love everyone. Good night.

i wonder what wal-marts electric bill looks like?

Thu, 25 Sep 2003 05:05:39 GMT

hmm..im trying to do ethics homework...but its not going smoothly. If you're reading this and you've taken an ethics class, I really wouldn't mind some tutoring. Anyway, today was weird. OK, last night this girl comes into the store, and she's like "my brother thinks you're cute, can he have your number?", and I was like..."eh..no". And then he came in and kept bugging me, so I felt really bad so I gave it to him. Low and behold he's a psycho. He called me like 8 times between 7:30 and 10:00. And he came back in and gave me a rose. It was nice and everything, IM not trying to be mean..but he just scared me. I think I attract all the weird ones. Well,...except for one person. Who, in my opinion, is the best guy ever. I talked to him tonight. Well, me and jenny lee did. He's so good. He makes me laugh, seriously like no one else. I don't know. There's just something about him that i can't understand. i think there's a lot more to him then he leads on. i miss him. why am i so stupid. oi. ive probably messed everything up though. i knew it. the minute i find a "good" guy i go and treat him like shit. grrr. i shouldn't be aloud to talk to people. oh christ..i think IM going to have James brown rape Jeremiah up the ass. he was being such a dickehead today. he kept making fun of me,, i mean, yes. i know IM very accident prone, but he just kept making fun of me everytime i dropped something so finally i just stopped like talking to him. and then he acts all worried. GOD!! he's such a...a...jerk. i mean, i had tears in my eyes. i could have used a hug...big time. Bobby came in and hugged me...so did Stacie. so that's good. i could have used another one though. *sigh* I HAVE THE DAY OFF TOMORROW!!!!! IM so excited!! IM not gonna do shit!!! i think i might paint my toes nails!! green!!! my boobs are too big. maybe i should lose some weight. i keep popping out of my bras. defenetly time to put the doritos away. yeah, so tomarrow shall be grand. I'll probably end up going to the mall. This guy that I work with has a hurt ankle and he has no medicine, so I told him I'd bring him some aspirin. if anyone wants to come with me and have an adventure to the mall..give me a ringie dingie. Or if you would like to rape Jeremiah...you should also come. HAHAHA!!! If I spelled it cum...that would have been really funny. I miss meaghan. I haven't hung out with her in a while. I really want to have a huge hug-fest, do you know how sweet that would be??? Hugs Across America. (HAA) That's what I'll call it. Yeah. I miss him. Baa humbug. I love everyone.

i lowered my cholesterol

Wed, 24 Sep 2003 04:15:23 GMT

I go through all this
before you wake up
so I can feel happier
to be safe up here with you

it's real early morning
no-one is awake
I'm back at my cliff
still throwing things off
I listen to the sounds they make
on their way down
I follow with my eyes 'til they crash
imagine what my body would sound like
slamming against those rocks

when it lands
will my eyes
be closed or open?

Bjork is so weird. i worked again today...and went to class. i dont think i belong here sometimes. i just really want to get out of here. i feel like im stuck. like, the world around me is never gonna change. maybe its up to me to make the changes. *sigh* if only i could change the past.
Any ways...enough of that martyr bull shit. what you want? baby i got it. what you need? you know i got it. yeah. im a silly goose. i saw john today! he came into Barnies. the only time i see him is at the mall. john...we need to hang out. you me stacie and dan should hang out some time. well...thats my story and im sticken to it...im so sleepy...i love everyone

unless they're weird, your kids will it eat.

Tue, 23 Sep 2003 03:33:46 GMT

Oh my goodness! i went to the eye doctor today, finally. I've always had problems seeing stuff...but it never occured to me to get glasses. So today i buckeld down and went to see the el doctore. He perscribed me bi-focals. now i feel like an old man..not a lady mind you. And then on my way out the door i get a lovely call from barnies asking me to come in. So im half blind trying to drive to work...and then i get there and my pupils are dialated to shit because of the drops he put in my eyes. I looked like i had just taken like 3 thingies of extasy!! Which is weird cause i dont do drugs. But i think my eyes are ok now. whew! So it was only me and jeremiah running the store tonight, it was ok cause it was slow...but i had to do EVERYTHING. it sucked balls. oh well...thats life. AND and and theeeeeennn stacie came and saw me at work!!! i was so excited. Ugh...im sleepy..but i still have homework to do..i have to write a dialogue between me and another person. weeeee. i love everyone!!